Dropped! 20 hours out...

This little machine I get to type on is so sweet, so sweet.  Just the right size, fits in my lap, the key board is smaller making it easier for me to type.  It's a delight to type.  12-12-12.  My sister Maureen's birthday.  She's 17 months younger than me.  You do the math.  She's probably having a good time.  I hope so.

Work was work tonight.  I think everyone is looking forward to the holiday break.  I will be attending the annual WSHS staff party this year.  I made it through last year's so I'll test my staff party mettle and go again.

The 20 hours and you're out policy at work came into play tonight and in a most heartbreaking way. It was a student we all loved, sweet young lady, always smiling in spite of my grouchiness.  But 20 hours of missed class time is a month of class time missed.  We drop them from the program when they reach 20 hours out.  This has been a strange year.  We have a lot of people 20 or more hours out but are still enrolled.  When we have to drop someone it's never pleasant for us.  I sigh a bit, think about the work put into the missing student, then think about the student and what will happen to them.  A student who has trusted me with his life story needed to talk today.  We usually spend an hour in a room with the door closed and we both listen to each other.  Today I didn't have the time.  I think I'm one of the few people this student confides in.  I told him we could talk but not as long.  We talked but I cut it short after fifteen minutes.  I hope he comes back to school.

I consider the tremendous responsibility I have been given and that I have been doing for almost 21 years and I just sit here and wonder how I did it and how I can keep doing it.  For me, I have to believe every day.  It has been difficult lately.  I was the Barkmeister at school last night.  As mentioned in a previous post, no one escaped unscathed.  Today one girl came up to me and asked me if I was mad at her.  I realized what a pompous asshole I had been.  I was tired.  I am tired.  I was hungry...no excuse, really.  Tonight I came in mindful of my temperament.  I was still tired but comfortable grading papers and signing off on contracts.  I ate lunch.  I drank caffeine. I was ok.  Not exactly exuberant, but I was going to make it.

What makes this particular job so fascinating to me are the disperate personalities.  The rainbow of stories they bring with them.  Their families and their babies, they come in all colors.  It is one of those places on Earth where it is good to be when you are there.  It is a job where you are in the moment most of the time.  It comes at you from all directions; the history question, the person who needs a book to read (yay! They're reading!) or whatever.  The conversation has been good over the years.  I'd like to think I've put the lid on any sort of homophobia that comes out of the mouths of some.  It takes a creative mind to roll with the Night Program.

A true and dear friend made a video for me today singing.  Wow!  I shoulda known.  I was gratified and flattered.  Made my day.

Made my day...which I should put to an end.  As much as I need to stay fed, I need to be rested.  Yeah, baby...sleepy time...