Welcome to the 21st century, Tim. You were just dumped by a beautiful woman you spent four celibate days with. How did she do it? She texted me. Yes, you read that right, She texted me and said she was dumping me because I was disingenuous. She texted me a minute before saying "I guess you weren't going to tell me you are on OurTime.com were you?" I texted back, "Am I being set up?" Then she texted me with, "No, you're being dropped. I don't deal with disingenuous character." Ba-dum. Just like that. A few frantic phone messages left, unanswered texts. And then, I went back to work on my kiln, got it wired in, loaded and firing.
Now, I'm thinking about what happened, what, if any role I played into. Frankly, I'm not buying the "you've been unfaithful to me by looking at online dating profiles" scenario. Yes, I have been looking at profiles. Yes, sometimes I write to someone who has a well written profile. It is rare in the online dating world to see truly original profiles. I prefer the no bullshit ones. So it is not unlike the English teacher in me to write and tell someone they did a good job. I guess that's wrong. I didn't know. Yes, we had hit it off over email and the phone. We emailed every day and then we started talking on the phone. Not long after, we began Skyping. That was a weekly event until my return from Fargo, ND., where she lives. I flew down to see her. Maybe a month and half to two months into the whole phone.video romance, she asked me how long I had been divorced. I told her I wasn't quite yet and explained how I was still married legally because we were trying to refinance my house so I could stay there. The only way it would go through is if we stayed married. She became another person in an instant while I was still me wondering why she couldn't understand what to me was a logical yet painful decision. We do what we have to do. I didn't want to lose contact with this woman. We had "chosen" each other and had an agreement, I suppose, that we would be exclusive with each other. I agreed. And still do. Some people are worth waiting for.
So, I'm portrayed as the bad guy again. It seems like she was looking for something to be angry with me about. I think she wanted to dump me anyway, but, as I have professed love for her, maybe she didn't know how. I'm a black and white guy, yes or no, she could have just been truthful and told me. To drag up some sort of paranoid accusation about being in the online dating world is just a bit too difficult to me. What was she doing online? How did she find out I was still online? Who's spying on me? Do I need this?
No, I don't.
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